I Make My Own Traditions

I've never gone trick-or-treating.  Rapunzel and the Wookie didn't believe in that sort of thing when I was a sprout, and to their credit I've also never gotten kidnapped or poisoned or a razor blade in an apple.  When I became a parent myownself, I was always volunteering at the local harvest party, but solo because elk season coincides with Halloween so Hunneypunkin was roaming the hills with a rifle as a manly man should.  After making up costumes for myself and my peeps (I couldn't afford to buy any) and then spending a good couple hours NOT stealing candy from babies (because that's what it means to be a harvest party volunteer) my two ounces of remaining energy had to go into getting my babies home to bed.  Not trick-or-treating.
Seriously, people.  It takes a lot outta you to watch all that chocolate fall into those chubby mitts, without sneaking a little armload for yourself.  Thank a harvest party volunteer, today!
We used to all carve pumpkins together before elk hunting.  But my pumpkin patch failed this year, despite my "Welcome Great Pumpkin" sign on the fence, and my skin blisters if it touches raw pumpkin.  However, I have no allergic reaction to orange balloons tied with green ribbon and wearing Sharpie'd faces.
This year, Angel Doll, Lefty, and The Precious think they're too old for me to dress them up in costumes.  Brats.  Pixie's elfin friend lent her a sparkly formal gown that, paired with Pixie's flaxen locks and Angel Doll's braiding skills, transformed Pixie into Disney's Queen Elsa.
So tonight, Hunneypunkin is roaming the hills with a rifle as a manly man should.  I'm trying to keep my mouth off the candy that Treasure and Angel Boy haven't eaten yet.  Lefty is enjoying a bowl of cheese with chili in it.  Pixie is collecting chocolate homage from the citizens of Arendelle with Elfin girl.  Angel Doll is burning a cinnamon candle and watching The Addams Family, and The Precious is Youtubing the Ghostbusters theme song.  Everybody's arguing over whether we love or hate Monster Mash.  (What's not to love?  It's a graveyard smash!)  I'm wrapped up in my favorite blanket, sipping hot cider from our own apple trees.  My jack-o-balloons and Jeremy Renner's life-size cardboard cutout are watching me sort through my rubber stamp collection while I search Pinterest for Christmas card ideas.  I have a dark chocolate Reese's.  I think this is the best Halloween ever.