Because I want holiday treats that look fancy but aren't difficult, I do simple things like cutting Rice Krispies treats into squares and tying Twizzlers around them so they look like little presents. Failure number one: didn't realize how stale my marshmallows were (having been bought for making s'mores at summer bonfires) or that stale 'shmallows make shattery Krispie treats. Frown emoji! I shoved my pan of crumbly Krispies into a corner of the kitchen and moved on to mixing up rum balls.
Traditionally rum balls are made with Nilla wafers, but those contain eggs to which The Precious is allergic. I substituted graham crackers, which did not contain eggs (also having been bought for making s'mores at summer bonfires). Failure number two: graham crackers apparently have a much higher moisture content than Nilla wafers, and I ended up with rum ball batter instead of rum ball dough. Frustration emoji!
Everybody knows that if your Christmas goodies don't turn out perfectly, the baby Jesus can't be born, and all mankind will be doomed to eternal damnation, so there was kind of a lot riding on this.
Traditionally, rum balls are made with Nilla wafers, but I remembered that historically, rum balls were made with bakers' crumbs and leftovers...or from their failures! So I pulled out my old Hamilton Beach, crumbled up my shattery Krispie treats, food processored them into a powder, and mixed them into the rum ball batter like I was Jeremy Renner and Martha Stewart all in one. Voila: I successfully made rum balls!
Christmas miracle? Not exactly. The real Christmas miracle was having a large family packed into a small house where we all enjoyed each other's company and made pleasant holiday memories. I hope all my critics and both my fans have equally happy Christmas memories, and I wish all of you a fabulous 2020!
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