Breaking Tradition

When the family is big and the fridge is small, the days leading up to Thanksgiving dinner are lean.

It happens every year. I spend days, nights even, prepping for the feast. The fridge, stove, and oven are so taken up with holiday food, that there's nothing to eat the entire week prior to the holiday.

Lefty stomps around growling, "We ain't had nothing but maggoty bread for three stinking days," and Pixie's like, "Yeah. Why can't we have some meat?" And then I chase them all with a wooden spoon because they're never too old to spank, am I right?

But this year I'm changing things up. Don't tell anybody because then they'll expect it all the time, but I actually planned ahead. I wrote out a menu plan for, would you believe it, the whole week. We're going to have actual breakfasts, lunches and suppers every single day of the week, not just one big meal on Turkey Day. Now before you go being overly impressed, I'll admit it's mostly freezer to crockpot, and there will be mac and cheese involved. But still. This family's going to eat like Jeremy Renner, there won't be a famine before the feast this year.

Do you have bad traditions too? Break them. Be bold.

All the Holidays

What with the next eight weeks encompassing Veterans Day, Globally Organized Hug A Runner Day (aka G.O.H.A.R.D.), Thanksgiving, Cider Monday, Day of Lard, Winter Solstice, Christmas, a bunch more apocalypses, Whiners Day, Bacon Day, New Years, some famines, two college graduations, multiple family birthdays, and most importantly Bestie's anniversary, I already know there's no way I'll be able to keep up.

I'm just going to leave out the jack-o'-lanterns but with some tinsel garland and paper snowflakes tossed around them, and top them with angels, stars, graduation caps, and party hats.  I'll put bowties on Hunneypunkin and my life-size Jeremy Renner cardboard cutout.  We'll throw some turkey, stuffing, gravy, cranberries, and chestnuts in the blender for a holiday smoothie and I'll whip up one big apple pecan banana cream pumpkin chocolate mousse pie for dessert.

The soundtrack for the remainder of the year will be my YouTube playlist of holiday songs that Angel Doll, ever the unsuspected prankster, hacked and infiltrated with songs like Cotton Eyed Joe

All gifts will be pennies, nickels, dimes, and quarters because I have a lot of spare change but all coins are rare now so they're special, like the driveway gravel Pixie brought in the house when she was little(r) and collected unique rocks.

Bestie and I will sit by the roaring fireplace with champagne glasses of eggnog to reminisce about precedented times, and all will continue to be well.

Full Mooniacal Halloweekend

One ought to expect the unexpected on a full moon Halloween Daylight Savings weekend, and this one did not disappoint.

There was a pack of dogs shattering dishes in a failed attempt to hijack the homemade chicken soup. We saw pretend zombies, with and without masks. We saw real zombies, with and without masks. There were late night angry drunk texts from my good friend (or whatever) Dromiquine, multiple light bulbs burning out all at once, and a howling cat strolling through the hallway at two in the morning.

There were also some successful firsts in baking, including a pumpkin cake roll and an eggless pumpkin pie, a fat batch of from-scratch chili, and lots of Darigold eggnog. We made a delicious punch with dry ice, carved pumpkins, stayed up late watching movies, and turned back most of the clocks but not all so that no one's ever sure what time it is exactly but nobody really cares because my life size Jeremy Renner cardboard cutout is hanging out with the jack-o'-lanterns and the hot cider is spiced and everything is happily ever after.