Putting Millennials in Their Place

First off, you realize we made Millennials, right?  If there's anything we dislike about that generation, we should own up to having architected it.
They spend time with technology because that was all there was to do when it was too dangerous to go outside or when they wanted to learn to work but safety regulations held them back.  They don't mingle outside their comfort zone because society harshes on them.  They're glued to their cellphones because those are their watches, alarm clocks, calendars, school notes, work schedules, encyclopedias, even Bibles, and because when they tried to talk to us, we told them to shut up.  Besides that, the generation gap is shrinking, and, Millennials have not just parents and siblings to keep in touch with, but step-siblings, step-parents, grandparents, great-grandparents, and step-grandparents.  (And you KNOW they have that phone handy, so THEY know they're gonna catch purgatory if they don't answer you.  Right.  Now.)
Let's extend the Millennials some support.  We need them, after all.  They buy things, and that keeps the economy going.  They watch movies, so Jeremy Renner can keep acting.
Be nice to Millennials.  They'll be running your nursing home.
If you're a Millennial, don't give up.  Your good friend (or whatever) Dromiquine will show up now and then to create drama and make trouble, but don't let her get you down.  The neighborhood gossip, Lou Scannon, will always be around to twist facts and make you look ridiculous, but keep moving forward.  They didn't have much good to say about your predecessors either, but we were learning on the go, and I'm trusting you to do the same.
If you're a Millennial, be patient with the generations before and after you.  Most of us are doing the best we know how.
I'm Generation X, and I believe in you.  And whether or not you believe in God, He believes in you too.

Size Does Matter

Left-handed The Precious was concerned that his younger brother, right-handed Lefty was taller, until he read that Robert Downey, Jr. is only 5'9". I was like, "The Precious, you're bigger than Iron Man!  And EVERY BIT as handsome."  The Precious didn't really give a monkey's butt about my opinion, because what your parents think doesn't actually count, does it?  However, that was years ago, and The Precious is such a studmuffin that his size doesn't matter to him anymore, and that's not the kind of size this blog post is about, anyway.
All my fans have been commenting that I haven't posted in quite a while.  (Thanks to both of you for noticing.)  My pathetic excuse is that the house has been extra busy for quite some time.  Grown children moving out of the house, and into the house, and out of the house, and into the house, and borrowing my laptop, and just keeping my attention in general because they're all so gosh darn adorable, has prevented me from much keyboarding.  But now, the size of my household has diminished.
The Precious lives at his job, and occasionally comes home to sleep.  Lefty and Angel Doll have taken themselves to college several hours away.  My Treasure has gone to study abroad.  (Don't ask her name, we've worn that joke out and it was a lame one to begin with.)  Angel Boy finally figured out we are legitimately nuts and has gone in search of sane people to live with.  (He truly believes he's not the only sensible person in the world.  Who's crazy now?)  With My Treasure and Angel Boy gone, the Prince isn't around much.  Hunneypunkin's nose is to the grindstone as always, so he and I just sleep in the same room at night and then see each other in daylight on Saturdays or sometimes at church.
The shift in our household size, and the testosterone to estrogen balance, has been so drastic that even my life-size Jeremy Renner cardboard cutout is in shock.  Pixie and I are basically bachelorette roomies.  We make the house clean and it stays like that.  The refrigerator is no longer so crammed that bottles and jars fall out when we open it.  We cook dinner and have leftovers after.  There's only one load of laundry per day.  I've put away so many layers of people's belongings that I found my laptop AND its charger.  Weird.